Forgive Me Sango

[browneyedmami.livejournal.com]

Title: Forgive Me Sango
Author: browneyedmami
Fandom: Inuyasha
Genre: Angst
Summary: Kohaku regains his memories and faces his inner demons
Notes: Written for iyfic_contest week 175 : Kohaku


She looks at me with love in her eyes and tells me that I’m forgiven, yet I cannot forgive myself. The thought that I killed my village including my father…..the idea is unfathomable. And yet she comes to me with open arms after the murders I have committed.

In one way, the fact that these memories were suppressed by Naraku was a blessing. I didn’t have to think about the horrid crime I had committed. I could continue killing without remorse. I was living without a soul, without morals, devoid of my true self.

But now, as I remember them I am faced with my inner demons, and wish his curse had held true. For when she looks at me with those tears in her eyes I feel the most gut-wrenching remorse.

I cannot follow you now my sister. Even though I now have regained my memories, I cannot bear to look at you and see the pain I have caused you, for not only have I cause you physical pain, but emotional as well.

I must face myself and my internal battle with my heart and soul before I can allow you to call me family again, so I send you off with my cold emotionless stare.

For now, I shall remain under his command and act as his ever dutiful servant. Forgive me sister. I will try to help in ways that are inconspicuous. Please stay strong and continue to fight this evil that has caused us all such unbearable grief.